“I can't go back to yesterday because I was a different person then.” - Lewis Carroll, Alice In Wonderland ★

Why
do I get invovled
do I accept it
do I care
do I say no
do I get jealous
do I obsess over you
 
I don't want you
but you have those moments
that makes me weak
the only thing that saves me from you
is my fear to show you what's beneath
 
should I be thankful
or afraid
that I might give in
to you
I don't know
I don't know why I feel like this
for you
you don't deserve it
I wish I didn't
why

Lately I've been waking up alone
Paint splattered teardrops on my shirt
Told you I'd let them go
And that I'll fight my corner
Maybe tonight I'll call ya
After my blood turns into alcohol
No, I just wanna hold ya

so it's been april, lovely.
the sun is finally peaking through the clouds giving a warm hug everytime I walk to the busstop. its officially spring and I can finally wear my oxblood colored leather jacket, my trusty brown bag is still with me at all times. Works all year round <3
 
I'm longing for summer, but at the same time I don't want it to arrive so it doesn't end.
I have plans and freetime, and also a summerjob so I can spend some money on fun stuff with fun people.
 
I'm starting to socialize again, a lot more than I used to. I mean I really enjoy it now, and look forward to making plans.
I always have stuff to do on the weekends now, but still that me-time that I need.
 
I'm still lost on so many levels, but I'm working on it (still). Either way - life goes on so I must go with it.
Go with the flow and enjoy the moment.
 
xoxo, lovleey

so it's been march.. fun..
I barely remember what has happened, my stupid non-existing memory is once again failing me.
the snow is gone though, which is nice, and the night sky has this beautiful purple/blue color that inspired this set. I hear birds outside, I can have my window opened.
guys.. I think spring is on its way.
*sigh* I wonder how the weather is in london.
 
I don't like when people get attached to me.
because I will fail them, somehow, for some reason I always do.
- don't go, I need you. just.. don't.. fall.. ugh.
Robyn, you understand this!
/ all heartbreak, wistfully painful and insanity
if we agree, you can hang with me /
 
but how do I know that it's for real, and not pretend when you can't even say it to my face?
i've had enough of this written compliment nonsense. grow a pair.
 
sorry, ok, something good then?
got more job = me turning into a shopoholic.
ops.
 
xoxo, lovleey

infact its even over 900000!
1,009,209 to be exact, set views that is.
 
that is a lot, for sure.
I love polyvore, and even if I have way more set views than likes its ok - it's not whats its about.
polyvore is my way to be creative and vent a little when I feel no one actually cares.
but you do, polvore :)
 
thank you ♥
xoxo, lovleey

this set is late, it was supposed to be made days ago when it still was februari.
i forgot, i tend to do that - forget things.
i hate it because it doesn't just hurt me but people around me aswell.
 
there is so much I want to do.
i want to live.
i want to experience.
i want it so much, and yet I always make excuses.
any kind of excuse I can find, money is the one I use the most.
why do I do this?
 
i keep having dreams where i'm on roadtrips with friends or a special someone. the car is packed with memories, the music is blasting from the speakers, the sun is going down and we feel so alive. i guess my brain got inspired by ke$ha and katy perry music videos, and i normally don't even listen to their music.
 
time is wasted on thoughts, why think when you can act.
is it because the idea is so great that the reality might not live up to the expectations?
i think that's it.
 
i keep pushing things away, "just give me a few more days" - days that I end up spending the same way, everyday.
 
i wish i could be there, and not here. anywhere.
i am proud of my home, my loved ones, myself.
it's ok to want more, something different. i've known this for a long time now, and yet.
 
i want to be close to someone, who do i choose?
is it even up to me? non of it is real, it's a picture created by my brain from all the feelings i have inside that wishes to come out. but i don't want to be judged - by myself.
 
"time you enjoy wasting is not wasted time"
this is so true, i have to start listening to it.
it's an illusion, it's ok to not be sure.
it's ok, everythings ok.
 
sorry for the long text, that's what happens when you're late. a lot to say in such little time.
the illusion of time that stresses me out for no reason.
xoxo, lovleey

A shot in the dark
A past lost in space
And where do I start
The past and the chase

Standing in the light till it's over, out of our minds
Someone had to draw a line
We'll be coming back for you one day
We'll be coming back for you one day
I don't even care if I know you, out of our minds
Sad to leave it all behind
We'll be coming back for you one day
We'll be coming back for you one day

It's the end of january, and the snow keeps falling.
NO MORE SNOW PLEASE! WE HAVE ENJOYED IT ENOUGH ALREADY!
I haven't made a single set this month. Why is that?
I don't know, I've been on polyvore at least three times a week and yet I haven't taken the time to make anything.
 
I want to do more, I have so many thoughts in my head I need to vent out.
A close friend of mine could need a site like this, he always keeps EVERYTHING inside and little by little he burst out things to me at times he doesn't want to just because he can't hold it in anymore.
- That's why I need this site, being able to vent without having to tell someone in particular.
- Share my experience, my thoughts. Hopefully inspire, or let someone know they are not alone with what they feel. It's comforting and I think everyone needs that.
 
I will hopefully work abroad this summer.
My fingers are so crossed they will soon snap of.
 
I skype almost everyday with some of the most fun people I have ever had the chance to talk to. They are so random and each of them so different from each other, I love every single quirk they have.
It's amazing, I really want to meet them.
Maybe I will soon, who knows :)
 
UGH! Why are some guys so stupid and immature!
We are not 15 anymore, and don't ever think you can use me or mess with my head. I'm way to independent and confident in myself.
 
We are like a coin that keeps getting flipped.
Some days everything feels so right, some days I want to forget about it all.
I don't know anymore, I just don't know.
 
xoxo, lovleey.